Husband has drinking problem
June 21, 2012 3:00PM
Updated: July 23, 2012 6:02AM
Dear Annie: My husband and I are in our 60s and have been married for 28 years. My husband and I both enjoy stopping at neighborhood bars for a drink before dinner, but I’ve noticed that he indulges quite a lot and often starts at lunchtime. The problem is, after he has had a few glasses of wine, he begins to get a little forward with the female servers. He kisses the hand of the waitress, which I believe is his way of showing appreciation. I support his empathy for the hard work these young women do.
However, in the latest episode, he grabbed a waitress’s hand and held it for what seemed to be an unnecessarily long time. I thought the waitress should have withdrawn her hand, and I asked her what she was still doing there. I did not make a big fuss, but she withdrew her hand and left, visibly upset.
I realize that I was rude, but it seemed like my husband was unaware of the consequences of his actions. I have avoided going back to that bar, but I don’t know a permanent solution to this kind of embarrassment.
We have been lucky that we’ve avoided any incidents with law enforcement personnel. I need your counsel.
Uncertain and Afraid
Dear Uncertain: Please don’t blame the waitresses for your husband’s inappropriate behavior. He is drinking too much to control his flirting and keep it within acceptable bounds. If he starts at lunch, it sounds as if he is developing a serious drinking problem. Don’t be naive about it. Contact Al-Anon (al-anon.alateen.org) for more information.
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