Boyfriend has history of violence
July 19, 2012 2:20PM
Updated: August 21, 2012 6:08AM
Dr. Wallace: I’m 19, and the guy I’m seeing is 22. We met at a mutual friend’s party and have been dating ever since. Mike is a great guy, and we enjoy each other’s company. He has always behaved like a gentleman whenever we are together.
Last week I met Mike’s ex-girlfriend at a baby shower for his sister, who is still friends with his ex. I told Amy that I was dating Mike and asked her why she broke up with him. Her answer surprised me. She said that he had physically and sexually abused her and she had him arrested. She said he was found guilty and spent some time behind bars for his criminal behavior. I was totally shocked and couldn’t believe her story.
She told me to ask his sister and when I did, she told me the same story and said that he had physically abused another girlfriend as well.
The next day I saw Mike, and when I asked him about all this, he admitted that he slapped his ex-girlfriend because she was seeing another guy behind his back.
I think I am in love with this guy, but now I really need your advice. What do you think about all this, and what should I do?
Heather, Ames, Iowa
Heather: Even though he has been a gentleman with you so far, I have to believe an ex-girlfriend and his sister are truthful when they say he is physically and sexually violent. Dump the guy immediately before he gets violent with you.
Guys who batter females are psychologically ill, and without professional help they will continue this behavior when something triggers their aggression.
Write to Dr. Wallace
at rwallace@galesburg.net
