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Father estranged from daughter

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Updated: March 23, 2013 6:02AM



Dear Annie: My daughter hasn’t spoken to me in 20 years. “Linda” is 45 years old and has been married since around 1993. I wasn’t invited to her wedding, so I am not sure. I think she received a master’s degree, but I wasn’t invited to her graduation, so I’m not sure of that, either.

Linda’s mother left me for her married lover when our daughter was 6. Instead of taking custody, I felt it best for her mother to raise her, which was a big mistake. My current wife enjoyed a good relationship with Linda. We visited her during her college years and gave her money to spend. But once she finished her degree, we never heard from her again. She didn’t reply to our phone calls, letters or emails.

Linda’s brother informed me that she and her husband have four children we have never met. When I tried to find out why she stopped all contact, the only thing she said was, “Whatever the reason that you think it is.”

Linda was trained as a family counselor. What happened in her training that would lead her to refuse a relationship with her own father?

Father Who Can’t
See His Child

Dear Father: This has nothing to do with Linda’s training. More likely, it is some grudge she has been holding onto for years. Since you are in contact with your son and he is in touch with his sister, ask him to act as your intermediary. Have him tell Linda that you are sorry for anything you may have done that has created this estrangement, and you want to know how to reconcile.

Write to anniesmailbox
@comcast.net



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