JERRY DAVICH: Burning bowl ceremony raises hope from the ashes of hurt

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Women join hands before releasing papers written with past habits, relationships and ideas into the fire during the fourth Burning Bowl ceremony at Sojourner Truth House in Gary, Ind. | Stephanie Dowell~Sun-Times Media

Sojourner Truth House

The Sojourner Truth House will host a “Coffee and Conversation” gathering from 1 to 3 p.m. Jan. 19 at 410 W. 13th Ave. in Gary.

Guests are invited to take a free tour and hear a client tell her story. Registration is required by calling Lillian Beasley at 885-2282. Discussion will include the need for volunteers, financial assistance and donated items such as food and clothing.

For more information, call 885-2282 or visit www.sojournertruthhouse.org. Donations are always welcome.

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Updated: February 16, 2012 8:02AM

Charlene looked up to heaven, recalled her recent hell, and jotted down ungodly memories to burn forever from her mind.

The middle-age Gary woman wrote on a yellow, legal-sized piece of paper about her haunting depression, lingering anger and ashes of regrets. She wanted them gone once and for all or at least until the next day.

“I need to forgive myself,” she wrote, among other private confessions that only her eyes would see.

Charlene joined a couple dozen other women — each with broken spirits and wounded hearts — Thursday morning at Sojourner Truth House in Gary. There, they took part in the fourth annual Burning Bowl ceremony to heal their hurts in a symbolic yet spiritual way.

One by one, each attempted to release themselves of their guilt and anger, blame and shame, fears and resentments. And with it their jealousy, dishonesty, bad habits and dangerous relationships.

Later, after literally burning away their written pains from the past, they would write down new hopes, plans and dreams for this year.

“It’s a new year, it’s a new start, it’s a new beginning,” social worker Pamela Key told the women. “We are challenging you to let go from things you may still be holding on to.”

“Today is the day for you to embrace a new way of living, a new way of loving, a new way of keeping the promises you made for yourself,” she told the female clients who sat at long tables inside Sojourner Truth House.

The center, just four blocks off Broadway, is a ministry of hope and help for homeless and at-risk women and their children. It is sponsored by the Poor Handmaids of Jesus Christ, who are rich in hospitality, advocacy and no-nonsense assistance at this ever-busy safe-house for the soul.

Last November alone, the center served an unprecedented 2,000 women and children, showing the need is there more than ever before. And not just from Gary, but from across all of Northwest Indiana and even neighboring states.

On Thursday, the women joined hands and hearts to take part in the Burning Bowl ceremony, the brainchild of Robin Beasley, the agency’s tough-love program director.

“One nod of approval from her will make your week,” Charlene told fellow clients to begin the inspirational program.

‘Now it’s your turn’

Since the agency’s day center opened in 1997, women and children have found their way there from all kinds of dire circumstances — domestic abuse, substance abuse, mental illness, joblessness, homelessness, hopelessness, you name it.

They’ve received health care, counseling, clothing, food and long-term housing when possible. The center’s staff of 20 performs minor miracles while avoiding major crises on a daily basis, usually with common-sense guidance.

“When you see crazy coming, you need to cross the street,” Beasley told the women, echoing the words of inspirational author Iyanla Vanzant.

Eighty-five-year-old “Momma” Rose Dumas stood behind the podium and belted out a spiritual song so emotionally powerful, guests openly wept.

“All things are possible if you would only believe!” she sung passionately.

The women then reached deep into their heart, soul and history to write their intimate confessions, quickly filling up their yellow piece of paper. Boxes of Kleenex were placed in between them. Some cried, others hugged, a few held hands.

“Now it’s your turn. Be as honest and as courageous as you need to be,” Beasley told them. “Forgive your mother, she did the best she knew how. Don’t remember the lies you were told when you were a child. And don’t just talk about, BE about it.”

The women would transform blood, sweat and tears into paper, pen and fire, as soulful music from gospel star Marvin Sapp serenaded their efforts.

“I’m stronger, I’m wiser, I’m better, much better,” Sapp crooned as a couple women sung along.

The women then folded their papers and walked outside, following outreach assistant Alice Dawson, who led them carrying the colorful “Sojourner Spirit Stick.”

‘Burn, burn ... amen’

Outside, in the parking pot, a large barrel drum contained a raging fire. Its sharp smell wafted through the crisp air. The women circled around it and held hands.

“We want to see new life in these ashes,” said Sister Loretta Schleper in a prayer before the women burned their yellow papers.

The women converged on the fire and tossed in their secrets.

“Burn! Burn!” one woman said.

“Amen,” said another woman.

“I feel such a relief — it’s gone,” Charlene told herself as the women returned inside.

Back inside, Beasley directed the women what to do next with the white sheet of paper in front of them.

“Now is the time to be specific about what you want to invite into your life,” she told them. “There are steps to achieve your goals. We can’t take an elevator.”

The women, with lighter hearts and newfound smiles, jotted down their goals, plans and dreams for 2012.

One woman kissed her paper and tucked it into an envelope. Another woman reopened hers to add to her list. Sapp’s gospel lyrics played in the background.

Charlene wrote on her paper, “I want to love myself, and to act like it,” before sealing it for a year.

Since arriving at Sojourner Truth House in October, she was fitted for new eyeglasses, allowing her to see her old world with new eyes.

On this day, she purged her pain with the other women, if only for the time being, with hopes she will rise like a phoenix out of her life’s ashes.

After the ceremony, outside in the parking lot, the embers from the fire glowed. The yellow pieces of paper were long gone.

Listen to Jerry’s new radio show “Casual Fridays” on Fridays at noon on WLPR 89.1-FM or www.thelakeshorefm.com.