Lazerus: A blind squirrel in search of a nut

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Indians David Yancey (14) rushes for a 25 yard gain and is eventually taken down by Pirates Tyrie Fuller (11) near the 6 yard line | Jim Karczewski ~ For Sun-Times Media

Updated: November 21, 2011 9:41AM

The IHSAA blind draw stinks blah blah blah. It’s unfair to teams that have earned the right to blah blah blah. Undefeated teams shouldn’t be treated the same as winless blah blah blah.

You get it. I hate the blind draw. I think it’s awful and punitive to both players and fans alike. And worst of all, it renders the entire regular season — which kids have been lifting, sweating and preparing for since last November —utterly meaningless.

I’ve been beating that dead horse for seven football seasons now. My dream of blowing up every conference, replacing them with each sectional grouping, then having the top four teams in each league qualify for the postseason and be seeded properly based on the standings is just never going to happen. I’m tired of writing it, you’re tired of reading it.

So let’s move on and focus on the madness and fun that is postseason football, shall we?

It’s sectional prediction time. And considering I went a perfect 7-0 last year, it’s safe to assume that the universe will correct itself this season.

So if I pick your team, I’m sorry.

Class 5A

There are seven teams in Sectional 1 you don’t want to face in a do-or-die game. That’s as good as it gets. And Merrillville’s win over Lake Central two weeks ago made things even more intriguing. You want to play Crown Point, which was an extra point away from taking Merrillville to overtime? You want to play Valparaiso, which won at Crown Point? You want to play Chesterton, which has Chris Katsafaros back at quarterback? You want to play Portage, which won at Merrillville? You want to play Munster, which took Lake Central to overtime?

Even though it’s a travesty that LC will play Merrillville in the first round (oops, there I go again), we’re still all but guaranteed to get a heck of a final out of this one.

The pick: Lake Central, because the Indians will get their kicks off cleanly this Friday.

In Sectional 2, you have six below-.500 teams and a 6-3 Carroll squad. And unbeaten Penn. Do I really need to spend a lot of time on this one?

The pick: Penn, because the Kingsmen’s bus won’t break down.

Class 4A

Thankfully, the blind squirrel that is the IHSAA (darn it, did it again) found a nut here, as Griffith and Morton are on opposite ends of the bracket. Griffith hung with Morton in Week 1, and proved it’s for real with a great effort against Andrean in Week 8. Griffith’s Austin Brown and Morton’s Chris McCormack might have wildly different styles, but they are two of the most exciting, productive quarterbacks in the region. And don’t sleep on East Chicago, which gave Griffith a heck of a game last week. For a half, at least.

The pick: Morton, because the final will be at the Governors’ Mansion, not at the Boneyard.

In Sectional 10, Lowell looked like a contender just a couple of weeks ago. But back-to-back blowout losses to Munster and Andrean have left the Red Devils in a precarious mental state heading into a difficult opener against Mishawaka, a 5A sectional champion last year. On the plus side, Lowell’s at home for the game. If Lowell can pull it out, the Red Devils likely would reach the final, where they’d face pass-happy South Bend Washington and Gehrig Dieter.

The pick: South Bend Washington, because the Panthers just thumped the Cavemen 37-13 at Mishawaka last week, and gave Penn its toughest test of the season.

Class 3A

In Sectional 17, things look pretty bleak. The region only has four 3A teams, and all four of them are under .500 and facing heavy favorites in the first round. Northwest Indiana could be one-and-done here.

The pick: South Bend St. Joseph’s, because Andrean isn’t here anymore.

Class 2A

If you hung around the field at the Inferno last week, you probably got the distinct feeling Andrean and its fan base aren’t exactly losing sleep over the blind draw pitting them against fellow unbeaten Wheeler in the first round. It’s an absolute shame that Wheeler will only get to play 10 games this year, while far lesser teams will get 11 or 12 (I can’t stop! It’s like an addiction!). But that’s the way Indiana rolls. On the bright side, River Forest likely will cap its excellent season with its first sectional final appearance since 2000.

The pick: Andrean, because the 59ers aren’t your typical 2A team.

In Sectional 26, North Judson travels to a red-hot Rochester team for the opener. The Bluejays are a dangerous squad, but the road ends in the final, anyway, where unbeaten Bremen looms.

The pick: Bremen, because former Michigan City coach Bob Holmes has the Lions poised for their second straight title.

Class 1A

Sectional 33, as always, is a total crapshoot. You have teams like Whiting, which plays a schedule loaded with 2A and 3A teams — but not a lot of good ones. And you have teams like West Central, which has played eight 1A teams — but good ones. And wouldn’t you know it, those two contenders play each other in the first round (biting my tongue), with the Oilers having to trek nearly two hours for the opener. That could be the difference.

The pick: West Central, because the Trojans will avenge their overtime loss to Winamac in Week 6.

From there, Penn knocks off Lake Central in the regional and goes on to lose to Warren Central at Lucas Oil Stadium, because Warren Central is preparing to make the move to NCAA Division I football.

Morton pushes Washington — let’s say overtime — but falls in the regional. Washington then loses to Dwenger, which then gets beaten by Cathedral in Indy, because some things never change.

In 3A, St. Joseph’s waltzes down to state, then watches helplessly as Chatard foxtrots to the title, because that’s how this works.

In 1A, Lafayette Central Catholic gets scored on one time in six postseason games, because life isn’t fair.

Now, as for 2A? The region’s only realistic shot at a state title? Well, Andrean finally breaks through at the regional after four straight seasons of crushing disappointment. But Bishop Luers — another 2A school in name only — keeps the region out of Indianapolis in an odd-numbered year for the first time since 2003, and we have four repeat state champions (all private schools, naturally), plus Warren.

Here’s hoping the region steps up and proves me wrong, as usual. I may get tired of the blind draw, but I never get tired of that.